My Favorite(s).

Before I birthed Elle, I didn't think I could love another human as much as I love London. My mother would tell me, "You just wait. Your capacity to love will magically double...and then triple and quadruple with every new baby you have." Like too many other things she has said to me in the past twenty-four years, I didn't believe her. I mean, if you've ever met London, you'd probably pick her over your own children. But tonight, as I was holding Elle and pretending to eat her perfect little toes filled with sock lint and kissing those incredible and seriously slobbery cheeks and squeezing her tiny body a little too tight, I told her, "You are my favorite human alive." And I meant it.

For two weeks now, I've been making baby-food for Elle. I made it for London too- and I'm telling you, YOU would pay to eat the baby-food that comes out of my kitchen. I think it's a big reason why London eats and enjoys every kind of food: her first experiences with solids were fresh, organic, flavorful foods with herbs and spices. Unfortunately, I can't say the same for the packaged rice cereal- Here is Elle's first bite.

London's dear cousin and companion turned 3 this weekend. Spiderman was out in full force, and London came along just for the cupcakes.

"Put your arms around each other!" Fail.

Watching cartoons with Marie.

And just to follow up: My ankle has seen better days... It's still swollen, discolored, and extremely painful. I can hobble around my apartment in a walking boot, but I finally have come to the undeniable realization that this will take months, rather than weeks, to heal. London is very quick to explain to everyone she meets what happened to me. "My mom fell down. She tipped on a curb and tisted her ankle. But, it's okay! You'll feel better!" Yes, London. And this is why I find myself with two favorites.

Sisters are from heaven...

The best part about living away from family is hosting them when they come to visit! We have had a slew of visitors: first, two short visits from Kyle's mom and step-dad, my grandpa who refers to himself as "Great" to London and Elle, and finally, Auntie Tarynie.













Together, we braved downtown Seattle, Pike Place, the Zoo, and things in our quaint little valley--- like Lake Wilderness Park and Preschool Story Time at our library in the woods. There is nothing like having your sister for an entire week.

Pike Place.

THE ZOO.

Following a peacock...

Brown bears...

Hippos...

And a monkey!

Everything was going swimmingly. We wanted to make one more stop on our way to the airport: a ride on the carousel. London was determined to ride on a horse. I had just pulled the stroller from the trunk and was stepping off the curb to grab Elle. I fell into a recessed rain gutter, twisted my ankle, fell to the ground, and cried out in the most utterly embarrassing pain! A family of good Samaritans walking by drove us to urgent care, Taryn took a taxi to the airport, and Kyle left work to meet me and the girls. Taryn texted me over and over again as we waited in the lobby. When we found out my ankle was only sprained, I tried to assure her, but Taryn walked right off that airplane (literally) and is now enjoying Pinterest on my couch. Most importantly, she has absolutely taken over my household and all mom duties. And that, my friends, is why I love my sister.

Plastic bags, please.

A kitchen table here, a shower curtain there, and we are nearly settled into our new home in Washington. It was a long journey getting here.

Kyle started work days after our arrival, and I stayed in Portland with the mother-in-law. I was certain me and my children would be the most insane inconvenience and drive my mother-on-law and her new husband to drink hard liquor-- but the arrangement was actually kind of wonderful. Kyle spent his lunch breaks video-calling me from apartment complexes and I drove up on the weekends in desperation, but we didn't like any of the places. I had almost completely given up when a complex less than a mile from Kyle's work offered a three-bedroom apartment on special. We walked inside and fell madly in love.

There are things to get used to; like how stores don't bag anything you buy, everyone drives the speed limit, only Mormons have children, and of course, the never. ending. rain. On the plus side, London would live with her sweet cousins and "Aunt Missa" if I let her-- and most importantly, Kyle LOVES his job.

We miss our friends, and the sunshine, and the familiarity of a place that, even though it kills me to admit it, really became HOME. But Amman, Jordan became home, so I think Maple Valley, Washington has a fighting chance, too.

Still working on The Master Bedroom and Living Room!

Lately, London has been getting cuter. She does this thing when she's tired and doesn't want to be obedient: "I'm always sorry, mom. I think I'm a yittle bit grumpy because I'm always, always, always, always seepy." [She uses the word "always" five times in each sentence.] Her prayers have been getting longer and sweeter. I caught her on camera, but she realized I was taping her and started acting crazy--- I still love it.

Elle magically changed from a sad, needy baby to an adorable, laughing one. She rolls to her belly now, and would prefer to stay that way all day if only her little baby neck could hold her head up that long. Is it too soon to say I can't wait to do it all over again? Best to stick with the whole "every two years" thing.

Goodbye Utah

I've been putting off writing this because I hoped that if I didn't publish it, it would magically not happen. But there are now moving boxes in my living room and I can no longer hide from the reality of big changes coming my way. We are moving to Seattle.

There are so many great things about Seattle. Firstly, Kyle's brother and his darling family live there, which makes me so excited for London and Elle. My college roommate and her family live there. Seattle has fabulous food, especially fresh seafood and a way better selection of organic foods than Utah will ever have. Speaking of Utah, it's not Utah. Goodbye to 6 months of freezing winter and constant air quality warnings!

London found my patent leather pumps.

Then there is the tiny detail that we won't know if he actually
got the job we are moving there for until next week. And the thought of Seattle's gloom and rain which sends this San- Diegan into a full on panic. I'm struggling here, people.

Elle and Cambria...

So what do you do when you have never been more terrified in your life?

 I bake.

In other news, we went to San Diego for Christmas.

And for an entire week, I just enjoyed being with my family.

They dressed her up as Miranda.

And Kyle gave Elle her baby blessing.
























And I turned 24.

And of course, I chose seafood!

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas

No interest in the tree- just scouting
snow to eat.

So we put some in a bowl and let her
 go to town.

We bought our Christmas tree today so my house smells like it should at this time of year. There is a thick blanket of snow all over our almost-a-college-town-but-we're-slightly-more-grown-up city called Orem. We survived the drive to San Diego and back for Thanksgiving, and now we get to enjoy my excessive decorations for 2.5 more weeks before making that drive once more. Someday, we'll fly home for the holidays and I'll laugh about all the times we drove the length of highway 15.

A tree for the girls' room.

Elle started smiling last week, but I have yet to catch that toothless grin on camera! London is quite the helper. She always beats me to comfort Elle with a pacifier when she cries, and tells me proudly, "He likes me so so much." London talks all day long and repeats EVERYTHING. The other day, she told me she was going to kiss my face off because I'm so cute. Here are some darling things she said today...

"Your hair is so pretty I've ever seen in mine whole life!" (where did she learn that phrase?! while brushing my hair)

"I'm so so sad because you say no to me."

"I love it, mom, because it is so pretty. It's like a princess and I'm so happy now!" (referring to her Christmas dress)

And her favorite thing on the planet is pretending like there is a storm outside. She always says, "Uh oh! There's a storm! We better hide!" -and jumps underneath the nearest pillows or blanket.









---And here is a video of her in action.

---And this is what she does with her stuffed animals- all day long.

What do you do when you really want to take family pictures but you don't have the money to hire another fancy photographer? You ask one of your husband's friends to take one for you on a camera phone, of course! I planned it all out: the location, our outfits- there was just one HUGE problem----no snow. My vision was a winter wonderland, not the barren wasteland of an almost-winter in Utah. So I told Kyle I was going to pray for snow. The next morning, Kyle opened the blinds and laughed out loud. "Baby, you got your snow!" The first snow of the season to stick on the ground just happened to fall the morning of our family pictures?! Coincidence? I think NOT. It's the little things that let me know that God loves me. Like this family picture. 

Mother of Two.

Yesterday, when I got out of the shower, London was standing on the rug with my towel in her hand. "Here ya go, Mama!" she said with a smile. "Thank you, honey!" "You're welcome." I wish I could say that every minute of the last week and a half has been this perfect- but, let's face it--- having two kids is twice as hard as having one. I think the hardest part is not having down time. I am never not needed by one or both my girls. Thankfully, I somehow only feel overwhelmed at moments that pass quickly [like when Elle spits up a river down my shirt while London is begging me to draw a family of kitties], so motherhood still brings me the fulfillment and joy I've been loving for the past 2 years. 

Elle has been a gem so far. She eats, spits up (still getting used to that), and sleeps, just like a baby should. Two things have saved me in this whole mothering two thing: 1) The Moby wrap. I made two from a pattern I found on Pinterest and they magically free my hands to do all of the things I wouldn't be able to do otherwise...like play with a 2 year old and keep my house clean! 2) The Woombie. Oh my goodness- it's a swaddling "blanket" that zips. It's a literal sleeping pill for Elle. 

"Look, Dad! I has a mustache too! I'm so funny!"

 London mostly does her own thing. She dances from room to room, making up songs about her favorite inanimate objects, pretends to be a princess, and every once in a while wanders over to Elle, rubs her head and says, "Awwww, he's so cute!" or "Awwww, he's so yittle!" She insists on helping with diaper changes and lets me know every time "Baby Elle is sad" and clearly "wants some milk", which is both helpful and insanely adorable. Meanwhile, London is really into Cinderella. Every spoon, stick, spatula, comb, etc. is a wand, and you better believe she will use said wand to turn you into an animal.  "Bobbity Boo! You're a froggy!" Also, she has recently discovered that she has options. When she's hungry, we go to the pantry and fridge so she can stare at the selection, put her finger on her chin, give a puzzled look, and say, "Hmmm, let me think about it. [long pause] I want _________."

I wish I had crazy, exciting stories to tell- but the truth is, everything so far has just been plain good. Today, we watched Stuart Little 2, and Elle slept in my arms while London laid on my lap and I played with those killer red curls--- and I was happy.

Enter Baby Elle

Let's start at the beginning... Two weeks ago Wednesday, I had my final ultrasound to make sure that Elle was on track for a perfect delivery. The ultrasound went like this...

-"Okay, here is her head. Oh my goodness she has a huge head! Wow!"
-"Okay, here is her femur. Oh my goodness that is an enormous femur! Oh wow!"
-"Oh, and there is fluid in her kidneys. The doctor is making you an appointment with a high-risk specialist. We are going to change your due date to October 25th. Did I mention that you have the biggest baby I have ever seen?"

One week of stress and tears later, I finally had the appointment with the high-risk specialist. The appointment went like this...

-"The fluid in her kidneys is probably nothing. She looks really healthy. Why is she so big? Do you have diabetes? I need you to get tested again for diabetes. You are a horrible candidate for a VBAC. Let's change your due date to October 31st."

I left the appointment angry. Of course the fact that Elle's kidneys showed no abnormalities was a marvelous relief, but that lady didn't know what she was talking about. She didn't know that I am an embarrassingly healthy eater and that I do yoga six days a week, or that I had been preparing for a VBAC for two entire years and had specifically chosen my doctor because he was going to help me do it.

We drove home, I called my doctor's office to set up another diabetes screening test, and we went for a family walk. While we were walking, I had to stop a few times because of contractions, the first I'd had the entire pregnancy. We made our way up the stairs to our house and my doctor's nurse called me back.

"Hi Bristyl. I made you an appointment to take the diabetes test tomorrow morning. As you know, Dr. McCarter will be out of town until next week, but the other doctors in his practice asked that I send you to Labor and Delivery, just to be sure that everything is going well with the baby."

---"Ummm...really? That's...okay...but I haven't had regular contractions and I feel fine. I mean...I don't think...ummmm. Okay. I guess we'll go."

When I got the the hospital, I was dilated to a 3.5. The first hour, my contractions went from every 2 minutes to every 40 seconds, and I was asking for my mother. I was admitted immediately. The nurse called my doctor to let him know that Elle was on the way. He was in California. The doctor covering his patients, Dr. Baxter, refused to deliver me unless it was a C-section. The nurse handed me the phone and I cried.

-"Bristyl, I'm sorry. I'm not there. I wish I was there. Dr. Baxter is covering another hospital and will only be able to perform a C-section. You have to think of the health of you and your baby. I really am so sorry."

I wanted to scream. But you promised. But that's why I picked you. But I want to have more than 3 or 4 kids. But I know I can. But we know she's less than 8 lbs so she won't be too big. But this is all we've talked about at every appointment for the last nine months. But you promised.

Nothing came out of my mouth.

In enters Joy Hartwell.

-"What's going on? No. No. That's not right. No."

The nurse gave my mom a look.

-"Bristyl, tell the nurse what you want."
-"I don't want a C-section."

And that wonderful nurse whom I now love forever set everything up for me to have another doctor come in from another practice to deliver Elle naturally.


  Dr. Baxter, realizing that he was about to be in an insane amount of trouble, angrily came to the hospital to deliver her, like he was supposed to. He was awful and rude, but the nurses were wonderful and Elle entered this world at 11:01 pm on Wednesday, October 9th. She was 7lbs 8oz, 20.5 inches long, and possibly four weeks early, depending on which of my three due dates you pick.

She had fluid in her little lungs, so she's been in the NICU ever since. We are on track to bring her home by the end of the week! I am most looking forward to London meeting her sister for the first time.